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story of the disappearing milk

June 16, 2017 by allan

So John’s been buying a gallon of milk every week and a half, you know, easy calories and he enjoys drinking it or having cereal. Sabrina doesn’t drink whole milk, we all know this, so it can’t possibly be hers. I don’t really like milk either, so it’s easy to deduce that it’s John’s. I guess Mark doesn’t have the critical thinking skills, but he just assumes everything is hers OR that she has permission to just give out people’s food without asking.

One day John’s like “Hey, did you have cereal today?” I hadn’t and replied so. He’s like, “That’s weird, some of it’s missing, and I just bought it.” We had our suspicions.

The next night, we’re hanging out in a different room, and they are being loud. Outside voices inside for no reason. This isn’t critical to the situation. They’re always just loud for some reason lol. I wonder if Mark knows that his voice carries. Anyway, they had just bought sandwiches. I remember this vividly because it was $1 sub day.

Homie goes, “Can I have a cup of milk?”

…me and John are likeΒ 

πŸ‘‚πŸΌπŸ‘€πŸ‘‚πŸΌπŸ‘‚πŸΌπŸ‘€πŸ‘‚πŸΌ

AND SABRINA GOES, “YEAH! OF COURSE!”

We look at each other ASTONISHED.

Like what? It’s not yours, and you know it!

In addition!!!! This bitch was still sealed the first time he had some!!! This is now the second (we can only assume) serving of milk this man has taken from this brand new milk gallon without asking. I can understand copping a cup of milk from an open gallon. No worries, no one will notice 8oz go missing.

Bitch gave no fucks it was brand new.

Filed Under: random