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random

gas station vibes

July 13, 2017 by allan

My friend, who shall remain anonymous, is one of the best story tellers on this planet. I can always count on this person to provide me with a lot of laughs at any time of the day. Here’s the story I was sent this morning.

Enhanced image of the illustration.

What a wonderful day to start off Thursday.

If you have any stories you would like to share, please don’t hesitate to reach out to me.

πŸ™

Filed Under: random

story of the disappearing milk

June 16, 2017 by allan

So John’s been buying a gallon of milk every week and a half, you know, easy calories and he enjoys drinking it or having cereal. Sabrina doesn’t drink whole milk, we all know this, so it can’t possibly be hers. I don’t really like milk either, so it’s easy to deduce that it’s John’s. I guess Mark doesn’t have the critical thinking skills, but he just assumes everything is hers OR that she has permission to just give out people’s food without asking.

One day John’s like “Hey, did you have cereal today?” I hadn’t and replied so. He’s like, “That’s weird, some of it’s missing, and I just bought it.” We had our suspicions.

The next night, we’re hanging out in a different room, and they are being loud. Outside voices inside for no reason. This isn’t critical to the situation. They’re always just loud for some reason lol. I wonder if Mark knows that his voice carries. Anyway, they had just bought sandwiches. I remember this vividly because it was $1 sub day.

Homie goes, “Can I have a cup of milk?”

…me and John are likeΒ 

πŸ‘‚πŸΌπŸ‘€πŸ‘‚πŸΌπŸ‘‚πŸΌπŸ‘€πŸ‘‚πŸΌ

AND SABRINA GOES, “YEAH! OF COURSE!”

We look at each other ASTONISHED.

Like what? It’s not yours, and you know it!

In addition!!!! This bitch was still sealed the first time he had some!!! This is now the second (we can only assume) serving of milk this man has taken from this brand new milk gallon without asking. I can understand copping a cup of milk from an open gallon. No worries, no one will notice 8oz go missing.

Bitch gave no fucks it was brand new.

Filed Under: random

Taco Bell

June 21, 2016 by allan

Taco Bell has always been there for me.
When I was broke and only had $2 to my name, the option of being able to play a game for 10Β’ or 25Γ§ for a crispy taco or a bean and cheese burrito really helped out.
Now that I can afford to buy the bigger items on the menu, the quality has stayed the same.
Please don’t change. ?

Filed Under: random

WooConf 2016

April 8, 2016 by allan

I got selected by our management to represent our company at WooConf 2016 in Austin, TX.
The panels were extremely informative and it was great getting to see a lot of speakers giving inspiring speeches over the state of WooCommerce.
Even though I didn’t get to attend the last day due to stomach sickness, it’s definitely something I would love to go to next year.

Filed Under: random

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